How to Fix a Photo-Op and a Tweet with Ambassador Joseph Sang in Stockholm

ndugu ben

Look for a coat, a tie, a business name and a good script then call the Embassy and request an appointment with “His Excellency”

If you are a Kenya-Stockholmer, you may know ndugu Ben very well. He has been active in the Taxi business in Stockholm and here he is, behind the Kenyan flag with Ambassador Joseph Sang after talks about his “Energy Solutions” business in Kenya! Is the “tweeting Ambassador” taking things too far?

If you are bored, call the Embassy and request to book time with Ambassador Joseph Sang. Even though you live in Stockholm, say that you are a businessman or a businesswoman based in Kenya and that you want to book an appointment with the Ambassador to discuss “bilateral issues” linked to “Business to Business” aka B2B.

The Script: You will be put through to the Ambassador’s Secretary. Once on the line, say that you will be travelling from Kenya to Stockholm via Paris, New York, London then Stockholm on a business trip and that during your stop-over in Stockholm to consult with some Swedish investors, you would like to pass by the Kenyan Embassy to have a brief chit-chat with “His Excellency” (don’t say Ambassador Sang). Make sure you have a good and convincing name for your company.

When asked about the purpose of the meeting, say that it is to explore possibilities of Embassy help in relation to your Swedish business partners. Add that apart from your Energy business line, you just linked up with the biggest Swedish bus manufacturing company and that the company’s CEO is interested in a venture  to provide 50 buses to ply routes in your home town back in Kenya. Then, release the bait.

You want to meet “His Excellency” because you recognize the role he continues to play in promoting “Business to Business” between Scandinavian countries and Kenya. You will then be told to wait on the line as his Excellency is contacted. With this script, you will, most likely, land an appointment. Once this happens, move to the next step.

Red Lip-Stick: Look for a tie and a coat at the minimum. If you can fix a suit, the better. If you are a lady, go for a business skirt (with a slit somewhere) and, possibly, a matching coat. Next, fix a weave or something neat and the day of the appointment, start the make-up with a good foundation. If possible, enhance things with a red lip-stick (mwuaa!) then pick up one of those expensive handbags you’ve always lined up for special occasions. Don’t forget the necklace (make it very visible) and, possibly, nail polish, fake gold bangles et al. That is it. Show up for the appointment!

Of cause, you must have prepared some bizz talk and carried a “business file” donge? As you enter into the Ambassador’s chamber, you will be ushered into the “business lounge” where the Embassy maid will quickly show up to ask you what you swallow (there are only two options, tea and coffee). Choose one of them otherwise you will end up with water.

During the conversation, take breaks to say good things about His Excellency and do mention that you follow each and every tweet he posts then add the following sentence jokingly: “I hope one day I will also appear on the tweets behind the Kenyan flag!” and you are done!

When the meeting is over, His Excellency will gladly walk you out of the office and before you say bwaii!, you will be invited for a photo-op guess where? Behind the Kenyan flag.

As you head for your apartment in Stockholm, you may want to check the Ambassador’s Twitter update. You just fixed a photo with His Excellency, which has been posted on Kenya Embassy’s Twitter account yeah! And the subject is: “just had discussions with xxx of Patco Investments” lol… Have a successful photo-op with “His Excellency”!

Okoth Osewe

10 comments

  • Osewe I see your mojo is back from a hiatus on Embassy intrigues since Madam Purity’s exit. You are giving Sang serious digital blows in relation to his choice of conducting kazi ya ubalozi. Sang could be the Esipisu of Kenya Stockholm Embassy – a press attaché for propaganda and not the Ambassador.

    KSB: Surely, 2.5 years in Office should have produced some results. With Sang having abolished celebration of national days, promoting corruption at the Embassy and behaving like a small god, the situation is getting worse and someone must tell Sang that it is not business as usual. He has taken certain choices which have consequences.

  • Balozi propaganda

    Balozi wa propaganda. Mwana haramu huyu!

  • I will use the tactics to get a photo-op with this Kenyan chief of Scandinavia.

    KSB: We can only wish you good luck. Keep us posted.

  • Sang took Kenya’s 50th Independence Day celebrations in 2013 to the ghettos outside Stockholm city center and prevented a large number of Kenyans from attending. People complained yet he did not learn. He does not see the meaning of socializing with Kenyans since he is used to dictating his embassy staff members whom he sees as rubbish.

  • Mr Sang is representing William Ruto but not anybodyelse. Mr Sang bought his fake degree in India where Ruto sent him and paid his education .jtalk to the man and you will notice the shit in him.His days are numbered as an ambassador.

  • Dr Sang is not worth to lead anywhere ,only kale-cattle boma for milking mursut !

  • Gestapo NAZI SS Officers brutality-Castrating refugee families from Syria!

  • Mjanja sana huyu mkale. Kutabasamu kumbe mfisadi mwenyewe. Fikiria ni pesa ngapi ameweka mfukoni kwa kutunyimaWaKenya sherehe mbali mbali kwa miaka miwili. Huyu jambazi kabisa.

  • Why does dr Sang look rapist? The photo with Kung’u one cannot diff btw Sang and the rapist quack dr Mugo wa Wairimu?

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