My friend Kipenji is an extremely interesting person. He believes that physical exercises is good for you while he also believes that he ought to do it himself to keep a better health. Unfortunately, his body no longer wants to do them damn tough exercises so recently, he called KSB to say that he had worked a better strategy of dealing with the problem.
He had worked out a brand new Program that could work for anyone facing problems with exercising. His plan is based on reducing the “physical aspects” of training the body while achieving similar psychological effects. When he called KSB to announce his new invention, he added that those wishing to use his technique can do so free of charge. The following is his proposal:
When you feel like doing a real exercise after a hard day’s work, begin by “beating around the bush”. Call a friend who has been nagging you about something and take the opportunity to exercise. Once the conversation begins, move the training to the next level by “jumping into conclusions” but if gets too hot and you are found trying to be what you are not, exercise by simply “swallowing your pride”. Wait a moment and when your contact begins to get back on track, begin to “climb walls”. This is good for your chest muscles.
Be careful because you may be cornered. If this happens, exercise further by “passing the buck”. This should be easy. Blame someone you don’t like whom you suspect could be sabotaging your efforts. Hopefully, your contact should then agree with you, time to “throw your weight around” by being bossy and in case any demands are made which you cannot meet (borrow me some cash kind of crap), pull a new style by “dragging your feet”.
Sometimes, you might not be sure about all outcomes regarding your proposals. This is the time to get back to the store of exercises and “push your luck”. You can then exaggerate the situation by using the next easy technique – “make mountains out of ant-hills”. Regardless of how you look at it, there must be times when you get your contact “with pants down” so this is the time to get in motion by “hitting the nail on the head”.
You could be caught trying that little lie to get through so retreat and say that you have to “wade through the paperwork” to be sure. Take a break! Everyone needs it in times of crisis. During break time, try “bending backwards” then when it feels good, “balance the books” after which you can “jump back on the bandwagon”. You should be very fresh now, riding on a new wagon eh!
This does not guarantee that things will work out. Your opponent may be alert so if the explanations are still proving to be difficult, “blow your own horn” but if the situation does not change, you will have no option but to start “running in circles”. You might be shocked that your contact begins to agree with you. Take advantage and begin to “climb the ladder of success” and before your artificial posture can be discovered, “pull the stops”.
This is dangerous and might spark an argument so don’t hesitate. “Add fuel to the fire” and if this doesn’t work, dig out some dirt about your contact then carefully, “open a can of worms”. Don’t care even if it means “putting your foot in your mouth” because that is life – full of ups and downs. Once the situation calms down and everything appears to be coming back to normal, exercise anew by “starting the ball rolling”. Stretch your contact by “going over the edge” and when you discover that your contact is losing it, say you are sorry and finish off your exercising session by “picking the pieces”. Happy training!
Okoth Osewe
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