It is now a week since the Kenya Unity Party was held in Norsborg, two days before the Jamhuri Day reception in Stockholm and one week before the Jamhuri bash at Norsborg Musikhuset hosted by the Sound of Blackness. As Kenyans prepare for these festive occasions, we wish to re-visit the Kenya Unity Party.
Kesofo leadership, which fixed the Party, must still be “busking in glory” after registering a success. There are Kenyans and buddies who came to the Party to follow up the Kesofo Unity talk while others were simply “Fun addicts” whose principle agenda was to boogie down to relieve tension after a week of work at different Institutions.
There were no speeches so someone who was never told about the Unity theme could not know why the Party was taking place. The Party coincided with the World Aids Day. Tonny Odera, an extra-ordinary Kenyan who has gone public with his HIV status, was present although he maintained a very low profile. Tonny is one very interesting Kenyan. He knows when to make an impact on people and he has an affinity for exploiting moments when there is a crowd to be addressed.
Coming from a legal background (he was a Prosecutor in Kenya), one quickly notices the legalese usually embedded in his syntax on almost every subject of discussion. At the Party, Tonny (as he is popularly known), preferred a man to man talk rather than group discussions. At one point, he was spotted in deep discussions with Susan Mukami, Kesofo Chairlady.
As its contribution to the fight against the spread of the dreaded HIV virus among Wakenya in Stockholm, Kesofo had brought along a pack of condoms for distribution. If you can remember, latest information filtering from the Swedish authorities indicate that 122 Kenyans are infected with the HIV virus, 10 having been infected last year. The great mystery around the revelation is the impossibility of knowing who is and who is not infected and whether they contracted the virus from Wakenya, Waswidi or other sources.
Instead of addressing the problem and looking into how the disease can be controlled among Kenyans, some citizens were bizzi, trying to map the romantic geography of others to try and determine who can be a carrier. You should have listened to this Kenyan who new the “chain reaction” of a recent HIV case which went public.
Although he had some good points, the problem is that he drew a terrifying outline of almost fifteen Kenyans in the chain, detailing which lady had “distributed the goods” to which HIV positive Kenyan then took up another guy who was now wriggling on the dance floor with another cutie in a way that suggested that they would soon be going home to potentially spread the virus if they had no idea about their status.
“THE LADY IN BLACK” WHO SAVED THE NITE
Interestingly, there was no mad rush for Kesofo condoms although action on the dance floor indicated that some boys and girls were definitely heading home hand in hand to translate some of the crooked dance moves into reality once they arrived at the ka-Crib.
So far, there has been no reform on the mode of Party dressing especially with the ladies. However, cold winter is pushing the girls into combinations that include tight trousers in different clolours with knee-high boots being the in-thing as the mummery glands are held delicately under stylish blouses specially designed to expose just enough to whet the appetite. In other words, there was draught or famine or ukamwe when it came to scenes where the eyes could feast on the usually omnipresent “fleshy legs” which comes in plenty during the summer.
There is one lady who saved the night though. Donning a black mini-skirt, she left the fatty tissues comfortably exposed and one could hardly complain because there was enough “surface area” for the naughty eyes to feast on. The only requirement was that you needed to assume a vantage point at the edge of the dance floor in order for the eyes to have access to both the dorsal and ventral bundles of meat as they swung to the beats of the music.
Besides, the lady (or saviour if you like) also gave a huge “bonus” to the eyes via a long slit at the back quarters which divided the skirt into two equal flaps. If you are wicked, you could begin to pray for a sudden gush of mysterious wind to breeze into the disco hall and blow off the flaps of skirt to expose the interior design but do I say?
There were no prayers and the wind did not come. But when the lady lifted one leg to kick a tune from the blaring speakers, your curtain less eyes got the opportunity to attempt “voyage discovery”. For example, you could try to focus on whether it was a normal thong or just the Y string holding the twenty or so kilograms of beef that was hanging securely from behind. The problem is that the disco floor was just too dimly lit for any meaningful visibility.
A very determined miscreant actually needed a camera with a flash then you could pretend that you are taking a normal picture. As the flash illuminated the scene in that one second, you could then enjoy the “eye candy” then carry it away in your dichital although that could have been a weird way of going around the puzzle. Besides, you don’t take those kind of pictures unless you are bewitched so we left it at that.
One funny thing was that although the girls were there in plenty and ready to dance, the young guys were not going for them like hot cakes. When I made an inquiry, I got more than I had bargained for. I was told that the girls mainly come to dance, not to park on the floor to be hooked because majority of them had their own ways of getting the boys (if they wanted the thing), ways which could not be outlined. Other talk cannot be published.
Both Mr. Kinyua, Mr. Kottut and Mrs Cathrine Kiboi from the Kenya Embassy arrived early and left early. It was interesting, communicating with the diplomats although they were very economic with “insider information” at the Embassy. This was normal because you don’t expect them to ropokwa at the Party and we understood this quite well.
For example, they could not say how much the Embassy spent at Kenyatta day reception, how much the Embassy budget amounts to and what they thought about the attempted kidnap of Mr. Cheruiyot, an ailing diplomat who has since been sacked from his job and whose story shocked Wakenya. It was an informal talk around the table together with Nick Andu, Daniel Mwaura, Munala wa Munala, Nelly and others.
AMBASSADOR IS ALWAYS “IN A MEETING” OR “ON ANOTHER LINE”
We told them that Embassy personnel needed to break away from the culture of “fearing Wakenya” by coming out and mixing with members of the community because as human being doing their jobs and as Wakenya, they needed some social life with members of their own community.
We told them that the prevailing view at the Embassy (as far as some Wakenya are concerned) is that Embassy officials who mix with Kenyans ran the risk of being accused of “leaking information” in case some sensitive stuff popped up at the blogs. This has been a long standing fear which has basically prevented Embassy staff from mingling with Wananchi, a fear whose genesis needed to be debunked.
We lamented the “unavailability” of the Ambassador both on phone and in action. We told them that when there is a crisis at the Embassy and you call to try and talk to the Ambassador, you will most likely be informed that she is “on another line” or “in a meeting” but that the message would be passed to her.
What follows next is that “she will call later” and when the call eventually comes, it is always the pompous Jenipher Vivian Awuor on the line. The funny thing with Jenipher when she calls back is that she never introduces herself for some unknown reasons.
When they appear at functions, the strategy of Embassy staff is always to leave early ie before Wakenya begin to get zonked because then, the line of discussions could also begin to degenerate. As a Christian, it was really an act of courage for Mrs Kiboi to come to the Party and stay for a while even if it was short time.
Majority of Christians never come to Kenyan parties because they believe that such attendance would compromise their Christian images. Being at a place where vinywaji are being consumed and shetani music is being played as men and women, boys and girls squeeze themselves at close quarters on the dance floor could surely be un-Christian.
However, when the Embassy calls Kenyatta day or Jamhuri day where vinyuaji are normally in plenty, many Christians normally turn up, at least, to eat the food and to ensure that the soft drinks are also taken care of.
Ocassionally, you fix something in your flat where vinywaji are available and the Christians normally show solidarity, sometimes praying when majority of Wana dunia are already toppest! The question to Wafarisai is: Is there a policy when it comes to attending Kenyan functions where vinywaji are likely to feature or are Kenyan discos treated with some speciality when it comes to attendance? We will wait for an answer.
One thing is certain. The Unity Party is something which should be repeated in the future even if it is not called Unity Party. I believe that next time, there should be room for the Kenya-Stockholm Christian community to “Pray for Unity” during the early hours of the Party.
There should also be some speeches while the kids also need to be catered for through some kind of “playing arrangement” which could begin earlier. A “Youth session” is also an addition that could help attract the youth into the Program because at the moment, they only come to dance and have fun.
Kesofo needs to be congratulated for a work well done and with lots of room for entertainment, sky should be the limit. Kenyans and friends have already shown good response to the Kenya Unity Party idea and what needs to be done is that the idea should be developed even further.
Okoth Osewe
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