Kenya Stockholm Blog

Cute Kenyan Chick Creating Inter-Bachelor Tension in Stockholm

Cute chick Kipepeo posing for a KSB Papparazzi

A cute fresh chick from homeland is creating a lot of tension among Kenya-Stockholm bachaleros who are jostling to lure her into their bed rooms to consume her newly arrived and “tempting to touch” goods. According to sources that are privy to underground dealings, the chick is said to be so beautiful that when she swings into sight, male animals of all descriptions – bachaleros, fathers, divorcees and other single elements floating around  -  begin to get mesmerized by her dazzling charms.

When she was first spotted passing across in a complicated swing to visit the ladies room at a joint in Stockholm, heads could be seen turning at a table that was crammed with male creatures as they began to talk in whispers, trying to establish her identity and status within the Kenya-Stockholm’s romantic hemisphere.

According to sources, the chick has now been nick-named Kipepeo while it has been established that she arrived from Kenya recently aboard a KLM flight. A bachalero who has been trying his luck, told KSB that when you think you have her patching on your laps, you soon realize that she is gone. This tendency is what has influenced the name  “Kipepeo” (butterfly) which is reportedly very difficult to catch when it is patching on a plant with any potential catcher playing the role of the plant. The bachalero refused to go into detail.

The chick is said to have grown up in Nairobi and that she has all the features of a sophisticated urbanite well versed in fashion, Sheng and Party life. “She knows how to dress and when she is present, there is just no way you can miss her”, another bachalero told KSB on telephone.

The problem is that she understands that she is in high demand and that she is using her “irresistible charms” to create hopes in the minds of various candidates before melting away like ice cream in the mouth. A bachalero spent a fortune on her at a Stockholm location and when he thought he had her in the bag, he realized that she had slipped away without notice.

One feature that has been reported is that she does not make any commitments and plays at the “friendship level” but when you think you have her attention and you want to begin to enter into the next level, she melts before you even know it.

This behaviour has prompted some bachelors to begin thinking about a change of strategy because the old methods are not working. It looks like Stockholm bachaleros are not yet used to her Nairobi orientation because they have been away from home for too long. KSB has been told that what is most certain about her is that she does not look, speak or behave like a village girl from Nyalgunga.

There is tension among bachaleros because different rumours and dirty propaganda have been incorporated into the battle plan to catch her for long-term consumption. Some bachaleros are pumping her with all sorts of nasty propaganda to try and defeat their biggest competitors and in the process, anything goes, tempers are rising while tension is high to an extent that some Kenyan observers now fear that if the situation remains unchanged, Kenya-Stockholm may soon turn into another Afghanistan, the epicentre of terror wars.

For example, she was told by bachalero-X that bachalero-Y, who had been chasing her, is actually jobless while in another case, a bachalero told her that the guy she has been talking to is married with a kid in Stockholm whom he abandoned after his relationship collapsed because his wife found him cheating with another Kenyan lady who is also married.

In revenge, another dude told her that the guy who had taken her number is homeless and on welfare. The dude added that although the guy bought her some drinks, he was actually in kronofogden. When she inquired what that meant, she was gladly told that it’s the debt collection agency. She almost chocked with laughter!

The weapon of choice being used by the bachaleros is that they can help her manufacture mappepe although this is not selling as had been expected because she appears to be testing the economic powers of her possible suitors by stretching their wallets to the maximum to see how far they are ready to go in the process of looking for her goods and trying to penetrate into her holy shrine.

Another thing is that she also seems to be “gathering intelligence” from her reliable contacts about different bachaleros and the question is where she will eventually land and how the situation will develop. The game is reported to be very complicated.

Okoth Osewe

January 11, 2010 Posted by makozewe | News & Analysis | 18 Comments

“I am Not Dead”, David Karoki Says

Mr. David Karoki, a Kenyan national who has been resident in Stockholm, has told KSB that he is not dead as is being alleged by people he believes are against him. Speaking to KSB on telephone, Mr. Karoki said that he was surprised to learn that rumours are spreading in Kenya-Stockholm that he died long time ago and that his remains were sent six feet under.

“Tell Kenyans who have heard these stories that I am alive and well”, he said. The Kenyan named a group of Kenyans whom, he said, were behind the stories. According to him, stories were spreading that he died during the 2007 post election violence in Kenya.

He said that the rumour mongers were saying that he was killed in Kibera slums after Raila Odinga’s Presidency was stolen by Party of National Unity. Denying the rumours, he said that gossipers who were spreading the false information were acting maliciously.

Sounding upset, he also attacked Kenyans who were spreading rumours that he had been sent to prison for unknown crimes. “The truth is that I have been away for long but I have not been in prison”, he said. I went to Denmark then crossed over to London before travelling to Canada”, he said. He believes that there is a group of Kenyans who do not like him for reasons he does not understand.

Mr. Karoki also took issue with Kenyans who were claiming that he was responsible for reporting paperless Kenyans to police so that they can be deported. He challenged those making the allegations to produce proof or stop telling lies about him. “The truth is that I have not deported anybody and people who are talking like that should take me to a court of law”, he said.

He dismissed those spreading rumours as idle people who have nothing to do with their lives. He was concerned that some of his friends who heard about the rumours may have become worried in the absence of information and assured them that he was very fine and eating ugali as usual.

The Karoki case demonstrates how far some Kenyans can go to damage people’s reputations. It is incredible that Sam Pippo aka Watu Wengine could engage in rumours to the effect that a Kenyan had died when he was actually alive and kicking. KSB takes this opportunity to wish Karoki well.

Okoth Osewe

January 11, 2010 Posted by makozewe | News & Analysis | 11 Comments

Shameful Flag at Kenyan Embassy Fixed

The Flag before (L) and after fixing (R)

Following exposures at KSB and a protest letter to the Kenyan Ambassador Mrs. Purity Muhindi, the shameful Kenyan flag that has been hanging at the Kenyan Embassy in Stockholm has now been fixed. The old, weather-beaten and tattered flag that has been a source of concern to many Kenyans has been replaced with a brand new flag that now hangs outside the Embassy in bright colours.

The Kenya Red Alliance (KRA) takes this opportunity to congratulate the Embassy for having taken action over the issue after it was raised on a serious note. Kenya does not belong to the Embassy or Ambassador Purity Muhindi. For this reason, it is the responsibility of all Kenyans to act as Ambassadors of their country and intervene when the country’s affairs are not being managed as they should be. The responsibility of looking after our country’s interests rests with Kenyans both at home and abroad.

The image of the country is very important and when this image is being subjected to unnecessary ridicule because an official being paid by tax payer’s money is not doing his/her work, it is the responsibility of the citizens to act. When KRA wrote to the Ambassador demanding that the issue be given due attention, it was not out of politics but out of serious concern. We hope that the Ambassador has learnt that the Embassy is not her private property and that it cannot be managed like a family business.

According to sources, there was an attempt by the Ambassador to blame the flag problem on the weather. Strictly speaking, the flag should be raised daily in the morning and lowered in the evening. Because this might not be practical due to the location of the Embassy and other factors, it is even more urgent that the physical state of the flag is examined from time to time so that it does not degenerate to an extent that it becomes an eye sore in Stockholm’s Central Business District.

The flag aside, there are loads of issues at the Embassy which needs to be addressed. Kenyans in Scandinavia need an Embassy they can work with, just like other nationalities and their Embassies in Stockholm. It is shameful that while other nationalities organize functions and invite their Ambassadors to preside over as the Guest of Honour, our Ambassador is permanently holed up at the Embassy and never attends Kenyan functions.

Kenya-Stockholmers do not want to be seen as the enemy of Embassy staff. There is need to cultivate a working relationship with this important institution so that its existence can serve the interests of Kenyan nationals resident in Scandinavia. At the moment, the Embassy has been reduced to issuing visas to European Passport-holders wishing to travel to Kenya and attending to tourists as the interest of Kenyans are routinely neglected.

This should not be the case and Kenyans in Scandinavia should send a delegation to meet the Ambassador and help her understand or come to terms with the expectations of the Kenyan community in Scandinavia. While the flag issue has been resolved, much still needs to be done to enable Kenyans in Scandinavia view the Embassy as their Embassy.

We take this opportunity to thank all Kenyans who contributed (in various ways) in putting pressure on the Ambassador to act on the flag issue. Special thanks to our Papparazzi who has been monitoring the flag and filing reports accordingly. It has been a collective effort that has shown that action produces results. The question which now remains is whether a new campaign is needed for Purity to be recalled so that a new era of dialogue between Kenyans and the Embassy can begin.

We have a Coalition government in Kenya and there is no reason why we cannot have an open Embassy in Stockholm where Kenyans can engage and utilize their potential to change Kenya in various ways. We are in a situation where no Kenyan can approach the Embassy with an idea because the bottom line is that the Ambassador is either unresponsive or sleeping on the job. If she could not even notice the flag problem until she was reminded, Purity needs to call it a day, say good-bye, board a Kenya Airways flight and return to the motherland to rest after her disastrous career at the Kenyan Embassy in Stockholm.

Okoth Osewe
Interim secretary
Kenya Red Alliance (KRA)

January 11, 2010 Posted by makozewe | News & Analysis | 7 Comments